Ten tips for cats who are forced to
relocate with their owners
For realistic tips for humans
who are moving with cats, read and visit other on this site.
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1. If you sense your owner
plans to move, be on your best behavior.
Revive those terminally cute
poses you used to get yourself adopted. Let your owner sleep
past 5 AM. Keep your paws out of your owner's hair.
Use the litterbox religiously.
If you must throw up, head for the bathroom and skip the windowsills.
You do not want your owner
to entertain thoughts like, "I don't want to ruin the beautiful
floors in our new home," or, "You know, it's really
hard to rent an apartment when you have a cat."
2. Here's a great game. Jump
into an empty box, stick your head out and hold the pose while
your owner runs around looking for a camera. As soon as she appears,
finger on snap button, turn around and point your tail at the
You'll learn some new cuss
3. The arrival of the moving
van is your cue to hide. You can have lots of fun with this one.
Your owner will run around
frantically, cursing the movers: "You idiots! You left the
door open! Now little Furball is gone forever!"
After they've wasted an hour
running around the neighborhood, appear out of nowhere and begin
to wash. When they shriek, "Oh there she is!" and try
to hug you, summon an aloof glare and wash your face again.
Bonus tip: If you really want to freak them out,
hide in your cat carrier.
4. As you begin your twelve-hour
drive, remember that your owners would rather listen to your
yowling than to the latest tapes or the local weather and news.
Keep it up!
5. Demand a sandbox break
as soon as your owner begins driving on a road where it is absolutely
impossible to pull over. A narrow bridge with bumper-to-bumper
traffic is a good choice.
6. Motel etiquette calls
for you to sit in the window, looking absolutely adorable. Encourage
passers-by to tap on the glass at all hours, especially if your
owner has forgotten to draw the curtains.
If you suspect your owners have snuck you into the room without
checking, begin yowling as soon as they try to move you to a
more secluded spot.
7. When it's time to hit
the road at 6 AM, you don't want to be found. If you can position
yourself under the queensize bed, out of reach of your owner's
arms, you can delay everyone's travel plans for a good half hour.
The award for the most creative hiding place goes to the feline
who wedged herself between mattress cover and springs.
This only works if
your owner really adores you. If you can't be found in twenty
minutes, you might be looking for a new home.
8. Insist on being present
when boxes are unpacked. Jump into each box to make sure the
contents arrived safely. If your owners lock you into the bathroom
"so kitty can't escape," use the opportunity to practice
your singing. The movers need entertainment, too.
9. Demand to test each windowsill
of the new home. If you still have claws, test the curtains to
see if they'll hold your weight. Fifteen pounds? Should be no
Miniblinds offer limitless opportunities for new versions of
torture-the-owner. How many can you bend? How about breaking
off a little hole for your head to peek through? Cute.
10. Encourage your owner
to get a dog. You may never have to move again. "Honey,
we can't move. We could never afford another place where Spot
could have a yard."
Make your move here...
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with cats (and people), read my book, !.
Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D.
Author, Career Consultant, Speaker
*Fast Track to Career Freedom*